The Cure for Feeling Like You’re “Not Enough”
Dear One,
Before I started my last business, Zhena’s Gypsy Tea, I was told I would need several things to be successful:
1. Money
2. Experience/ an MBA
3. A team
4. A go to market strategy
What I had reflected nothing on that list:
1. Debt & a credit score of 300
2. A 3/4 of the way done BA in English/Creative Writing
3. A Team of collection agencies calling every 40 seconds
4. A computer with no internet
5. No idea what a “go to market” strategy even was
I felt crappy about myself, but I needed to get my life together for my son. And through this, I began to take actions toward what seemed impossible: starting a business. So, I packed up my infant into my 3-tone Nissan Sentra and headed to Ventura (driving in the slow lane, I could get the old car up to 45 miles per hour), and camped out in the business section of Barnes and Noble as I nursed him.
I read every book I could find on starting up a business. I found a business plan template through www.score.orgthrough the computer at the library, and set to work writing what would become a simple plan with a big heart. When I wrote that plan, I had no idea it would end up being a business with products in tens of thousands of stores. I just saw a means to make tea fun and inspiring, and the trail led to what was seemingly impossible–a new life.
I had spent much of my life at this point feeling a lot of inadequacy and self doubt, but when Sage was born, the luxury of self-flagellation at the expense of my time was gone. I say luxury, because we often spend more time beating ourselves up than we do in taking action toward our dreams, and we use a lack of resources as proof of our inadequacy–and wasting this sort of time and energy is a luxury in a world where time and energy are all it takes to be successful!
This spell of not “being enough” causes us to freeze, or simply function at the level of safety we are used to. Instead of following the dream, we feel as though we are “not enough” and stop our potential in our tracks. So, how do we motivate ourselves to push past barriers, build a life of our dreams, and fulfill our potential when we are feeling like the world is too hard to manage and we don’t have the skills to change our circumstances?
Take action. Any action.
If you don’t know what that action should be, make a call to ask for help.
If you want to paint, buy a canvas.
If you want to dance, do.
If you want to lose weight, get a fitbit.
If you want to start a business, download a business plan template.
If you want to write, go out and get a shiny new journal and then schedule time in your calendar to write.
If you want to take your mom to Italy, get a canning jar and pour your loose change into it–keep it in plain sight.
Any action will do when taken in the direction of your dream. If you don’t know how or what that action should be, then take action to seek guidance. Action is the secret ingredient for changing our feelings of inadequacy, building confidence, being happier and igniting our destinies. By taking action, you are setting your world into motion, and your world will reflect back on you in new ways. You will start to see a path being laid out before you, all you need to do is step.
And then, tell yourself this, “I am enough. Being me is enough to make this dream real.”
What action will you take today? I’m ready to lose the weight I gained writing Life by the Cup (a sacrifice I made for art :), and I charged up my fitbit this morning. In the midst of launching my book, I am also going to get up and move, and that will help me feel like I am doing something to accomplish a new dream: getting in the best shape of my life. You see, we all have a dream, and by taking action you become enough to fulfill it.
What action will you take today? Let me know in the comments below. And if you need help taking action, ask me for help below in the comments. I’m sending you love and energy toward your understanding that YOU ARE ENOUGH 🙂 XXO Zhena
