When was the last time you spent a couple hours in total silence? Have you ever taken a silent retreat? Would it be possible to have more silence in your busy life?

Medical studies are proving that silence renews us, and more of it leads to a life with less stress, less fear and anxiety, and more creativity. Why? Because even subtle noise sends messages through our auditory system to our brain that we need to be aware, prepped, on guard and that eventually taps our minds, our adrenals, and ultimately our ability to create.

A study out of Duke University found that two hours of daily silence prompted the growth of new cells in the hippocampus–the part of our brain responsible for memory. They also discovered that even subtle noise, when constant, causes the adrenals to produce cortisol–the stress hormone that puts us on notice that danger is around the corner. 

In the last several months, I’ve been using a BOSE noise canceling headset even to be in my home. From Willow, our rescue dog’s, nails on the wood floor (and her barking) to the hum of the refrigerator, I’ve witnessed my mind seeking complete silence. When I spend ample time in total quiet, I’ve noticed my creativity and ability to find creative solutions to my work strengthen. 

I wonder how often you get to be in total silence? I wonder if there has been a time you could hear the silence and feel your body relax into it? 

My goal for this newsletter is to continuously spark your next inspired move, to give you the thought-nuggets that will help you uncover and rediscover those hidden aspects of your higher nature so that you can realize not only your genius, but your divine-original nature. I know from hearing from so many of you that you crave creative time, more abundance, and more joy. I believe we can find all of those things through the gateway of more silent time. 

When we begin to spill over from our creative silences, we know it as a sensation, a need to share. Wanting to share with others our work, our ideas, our inner being.

So often we “leak” into the world around us, before we have truly germinated the ideas within us, before the well spills over its nectar. We share too early and watch the facial expressions of others—seeking validation begets seeking validation.

But when we give our work time, when we give it silence, when we give it singular focus, when we emerge with our original song – that which only we can sing. We transcend seeking.
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​​​​​​​True creative work emerge from cutting the noise from outside influence, voice, advertisement, or old mantras that hold us back like: You can’t really do this. You can’t say that, can you? Or That’s not important. Or worse: Who will buy it? Originality comes from the depths of silence; it is excavated from the soul. It is something so original in its vibration that we cannot know anything other than its truth.

In silence may we know our sacred name. Sound not word, the seed of our soul springs forth in the quiet we feed it. 

When we rise early, before the light we are able to shape time to fit our creative needs. 

In silence, we find the thread of the universe as it leads to true, divine, creative expression.

In silence, we give more weight to our creative lives than to our email and our day jobs.

In silence, we are able to choose our original voice over our tamed and pleasing tones learned from making due, from making peace within the walls of our family home.

What abundant sojourn awaits on the other side of our commitment to ample silent time?

Your soul’s language is not like any other before or since the birth of humankind.

Commit to be free from wants and commerce.

Commit to be free from what others think.

Commit to write, speak, and create from the heart behind the heart. 

How will you engage and explore such a bounty?

We leak our time like pierced vessels.

We sway when the other people’s tides shift.

We make this-and-that our business, avoiding our one and only call to create.

We use what once worked as children to supplant the honest drive in us as adults.

This week, let us plant the seed of our creative silence into the world in which we find ourselves.  Learn to be alone. Learn to revel in silence. Engage with the quiet pre-dawn. Experience sunrise as renewal. Be no longer beleaguered. Be no longer engaged with this and that nonsense of others. Be firm in your grip as you wield the tool of discernment—a pen, a paintbrush, a kiln, a voice.

​​​​Be the creative you were born to be.
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Because true creativity is not derivative. It is fresh. It is the answer to all of your heart’s desires.

​​​​​​​It cannot be replicated either. Yours is not hers, nor can it ever be his.

Silence gives birth to the original voice found under cover of your thoughts.

Your original, creative voice sings in solidarity with the divine river found underneath the surface of the city. Sing out. Sing wide and tall. Sing the song of silent reaching and finding.

​​​​​​​I am grateful for you brave, beloved one. You are here with me, we are here together, pick axing the mountainside in search of our vein of gold, our vein of divine, original expression.

With Silence and Grace,

Get into your happy place. Imagine a garden filled with flowers. Hummingbird? Check. Bees? Check. A gorgeous lover awaiting you with a cup of tea and a cozy blanket, check. Tree leaves catching shimmer in late Fall sunshine. Check. You cuddle up with a journal and your favorite pen of all time—finally, to write, reflect, and ponder life’s bigger, more profound questions.

This is the mind of the peaceful. This is the spacious setting of the mystic.

Now, imagine in this beautiful, sacred place there are a dozen or so people yelling—at you. One is named Facebook—he wears blue. One is Twitter, he wears a turquoise golf shirt. One is CNN, in bright red. Another is called Money, obviously he wears green. Then you have Obligation, she’s always in bright pink. Then you’ve got Desire, who is always naked and just out of reach. Of course Guilt arrives wearing black—she’s like, “WTF are you doing writing/dreaming/relaxing when you could be helping so and so or earning money and making yourself USEFUL!” Climate Change arrives with a burnt snack that burns your tongue, she then douses you with rising ocean water. Body Image walks out to you then, demanding you get to the gym or risk getting fat—“oops, too late,” she mocks, snapping a whip.

This is the mind of the modern person. This is what we’re all up against when it comes to our dreams, our creative endeavors, our peace of mind.

What’s the medicine for the modern mind-bending we must endure just to get to the other side of each day?

It is to: Fill Your Brain with Beauty.

How does one fill their brain with beauty on their morning commute?

Listen to a beautiful book on Audible.

Wear your favorite essential oil.

Add shimmer to your hand lotion and watch your hands catch light.

Read and look only for things that carry hope.

How does one fill their brain with beauty at work?

Only look for things you admire about the people you work with.

Seek out virtue in each task.

Repeat mantras as you do your job: I always repeat, “Thank-you, God,” no matter what I’m doing.

How can you fill your brain with beauty when you look in the mirror?

Gaze at yourself the way you gazed at your child for the first time. Or a child you love.

Touch your skin and say, “Thank-you, God.”

Notice the eyes behind your eyes, the effortless presence of your soul awaiting connection.

How can you fill your brain with beauty in each moment?

Make beautiful choices.

Meditate on the Mystery of Breath.

Look for beauty in everything.

Be beautiful to everyone you meet.

Choose beautiful media to absorb.

Write about what you find beautiful in a journal each morning.

Seek beauty in yourself: in each hand gesture, thought and word.

Find that garden within your soul, and invite the loud guests to leave.

Gather your boundaries like you would gather your children. Keep them close.

Initiate creative expression by clearing distractions.

Undress doubt. Marry the Divine.

Life on earth is love in detail.

Look for the most beautiful details with which to fill your mind.

May the beauty you are be all that you do.

You can transform the world in this way.

Meet me in the comments and do tell me what you find beautiful today. We need to generate more of what is good, beautiful, and uplifting now.

With Your Beauty in Mind,

Imagine this…

You have $25 million dollars in the bank (but you never use it because money has become obsolete)

You’re completely healthy and there’s no such thing as climate change.

Bees are healthy. There are no such things as pesticides.

Cancer has been eradicated with a natural medicine and there are no side effects. It’s the equivalent and as easy to overcome as the common cold.

You have friendly access to all of your exes, and your deceased loved ones show up whenever you need them—for tea and hugs.

2016 never even happened. There is no need for a president because we are self-ruling, peaceful and collaborative as a whole people.

There is no chance for nuclear war, because the fear ego disappeared and all weapons have been dismantled.

There are no guns, because there is no fear and no one trying to get something they don’t already have. Everyone has everything they need.

There is no poverty.

There is clean water for everyone.

Everyone has ample amounts of healthy, organic food at their fingertips.

Everyone has a beautiful home with solar, being “off grid” is now the norm.

You are loved, beloved, cherished, and only do things that bring you and others joy.

You experience true love in your romantic life, and your creative endeavors satisfy your deepest needs for expression.

Sound like a fantasy novel? Sound like a Pollyanna take on science fiction? Maybe so, but what if? What would life be like without opposition, darkness, damaged egos, poverty and power struggles?

Now, imagine your life being wrapped in this new reality. Visualize this along with me for the next seven days starting today, for a few minutes a day.

Allow the peace and tranquility to soothe your nervous system.

Allow the love and abundance to inform each move you make.

What would you do? Who would you be?

Me? Thanks for asking :-). I’d write fantasy fiction. I’d adopt a bunch of animals. I’d have a big happy group of people living on my property, growing food and creating beautiful art. I’d have my kids running an entertainment studio making funny and inspiring content. I’d also continue to teach and hold space for visionaries and creators.

But most of all, I think I would relax. I would relax into the knowing that the planet would not only survive me but thrive for millennia, forevermore.

I wouldn’t be so worried about the loss of species and plankton.

I wouldn’t be so worried about the pain and suffering in the world.

I would act as though the earth was a magic carpet, spinning my awareness through seasons and space.

I would rejoice.

Yesterday it was 109 where I live. 109 degrees on October 23^rd? Last night the winds hit 60 MPH and broke branches off my trees as I laid in bed in the 90 degree heat. I left the French doors open so I could hear if there were sirens. I was up all night. I ran through the escape drill in my head as I listened to the winds and sweat through my PJ’s. I packed the car just in case and hosed down around the house at 1am.

As this was happening, I felt the world crying.

I realize that there is a lot of fear and worry right now on the planet and last night became an exercise in feeling it full on. I have been listening, watching, and helping those where I can endure the sadness of lost homes, infrastructure, and even lives to natural disasters and war. Income inequality seems to be a common conversation. People are looking for safe havens to raise their babies and live simply. We have a president that makes us doubt our sanity, not to mention his.

We are looking to leaders for leadership, except those we look to don’t know how to lead anymore. So how will we lead? How will you lead?

I hope you will join me and let me know what comes up for you as you do your visualizations. I’m thinking we will find some solutions to act on. I’m thinking we may even learn how to grow our compassionate action in the world.

Meet me in the comments. Let’s join in imagination and vision. Let us begin. Let us co-create what is possible…

With love,

As a strategist for business and creatives, I find that persistence in perspective separates the most successful and happy folks from those who may be financially successful but inherently insecure in what they are here to offer the world. What does that mean? That having a clear and consistent point of view is the key to a path of joy, even in the face of the big changes and the unraveling of old systems and beliefs in our world.

Persistence in perspective is a master’s journey, and if you’re in business or writing a book, leading a team, or coaching others, you’re on it.

My perspective is clear just after my morning meditation. I feel grounded, centered, and able to excel at my day. When the email box opens up, the news feed triggers, and the kids throw me curve balls (anyone out there raising a teenager—you deserve some extra hugs), it can feel as though the once steady ground is on wheels. I may realize there are some deadlines missing from my Outlook calendar, or my husband is out of town during a time I’d scheduled a conference—inevitably, something arises that is bound to destabilize what calm had permeated my post-meditation mind.

In these moments, it’s easy to lose perspective and become reactive. Our persistence in our worldview flags. We may doubt a decision or waffle over a pending choice. We may feel unsafe or frustrated.

This is where we need to expand our perspective, remain persistent, and continue to move toward our goals. Goals give our days purpose, and perspective. Persistence is a stubborn optimism that finds solid ground again, even if that solid ground is charred, cracked, or on another continent.

What feeds your broader, brighter perspective? In times as harrowing as those we’ve had this year with the climate changing faster than our infrastructure can manage, I have found a lifeline in morning and afternoon rituals. I share these in hopes to keep you strong, joyful, and engaged in your highest perspective, always, persistently.

Morning Perspective Rituals

1. Mindfully boil water for tea. Listen to the water as it bubbles and bursts. It is a treasure to have tea in the morning. Inhale the aroma and become fully engaged in the process of tasting.
2. Read poetry before you check your email. I find insight and perspective in Hafiz, Mary Oliver, and Robert Bly. Poets are the scribes of the soul, remind your mind how your soul actually speaks through reading one or two inspired poems before your check into the office, or the surface world.
3. Journal by hand for five minutes. I write with a fabulous pen in a beautifully bound journal, and it’s like shaking out an asleep leg. As I write, my mind runs around incoherently for a minute or two before it closes in on a higher purpose. Perspective of the bigger picture, broader goals, and wondrous callings arrive in these pages. I am able to retune to the harkening of my calling, my soul, as the words appear. Journaling has also proven to help alleviate physical pain. As you physically write, you can feel things leave your body.
4. Earplugs. Bose noise cancelling headset. Silence. If you are a sensitive (if you’re on this mailing list, it’s safe to assume you are J), you will be sensitive to sound. I had an insight a few months ago (while journaling) that if I could physically block out some of the noise from the pets, kids, and neighborhood leaf blowers, I could concentrate more. This was one of my greatest discoveries—ever. Since wearing earplugs in the mornings, as I’m doing these rituals, I can hear my guidance crystal clear. I can write, read, concentrate, and I feel like I’m in a held space—a bubble of connective thought and clarity. This simple ritual has become a game changer for editing and writing—both tasks I do several hours each day.
5. Tending to the altar. Sometimes it can feel like your iPhone is your altar. You tend to it more often than you tend to your heart, mind, or body. People text now as if it were a lifeline—and to some, it’s both validation and a quick fix—getting that red dot on your phone pulls you toward connection—does it not? But what you are really, truly craving is tending to an altar. One of my authors, Lama Tsultrim Allione says, “A home without an altar is like a body without a soul.” And I find this to be both a dramatic and true statement. We crave that which is sacred. Keeping an altar helps center your home, your mind, and your thoughts. It gives reverence to the mundane world. I use a Tibetan singing bowl to clear the air. I sage my body with a smudge stick. I pray for my family, friends, and nature. I light a candle and some incense. These simple rituals will bring you renewed perspective and grace.

While many of our lives are held steady in persistence, they are not always centered by our higher purpose’s perspective. For me, persistence in the daily rituals allows my mind a constant cleansing bath, opening my eyes to unexpected nuance and opportunity. When we can see clearly, we can make clear decisions. When we can persistently center, we can achieve audacious goals. The point is to find what works for you to keep your heart and mind connected. What matters is that you feel like you can get your head above the clouds in order to chart a distinguished, fulfilling path. You are on the mastery road of creating your life, day by day, word by word, interaction by interaction. Do what it will take to keep yourself well-cared for, and watch the world meld to your higher perspective in miraculous ways. If we can keep our persistence of perspective, I am confident we can recreate our world.

What keeps you clearly connected to your higher purpose? I’d love to hear in the comments.

Here’s to your success, today, tomorrow, and always.

Sometimes I dream up a new business, juicy idea, or audacious goal, and then I check the news and see the suffering in the world and lose my motivation to build, as all of my thoughts go straight to: Repair. Fix. Change.

Can you relate?

I just got off the phone with my author, Jon Marro. We were talking about the intensity of the fires, hurricanes, and that the president of our country is threatening nuclear war.

It’s real, it’s scary, and we cannot become paralyzed by it—we need to activate.

If I’m going to be honest, I’ve been thinking more about climate change than creating new businesses. Although I am working on a new business centered around supporting the original Gypsies of India, and I’m formulating a new publishing model…I often wonder if any of it is enough?

Are you in the same boat?

Are you feeling small in the face of such enormous problems?

I remember happening upon a clear cut forest as a child in Idaho—just beyond the road, everything was clean shaven and bare. I stopped and stared, my heart sinking and my mind wondering how on earth I could control any of it. The forces are so much bigger than us. The greed, the wounded male ego with its voracious need for power and energy, the silenced women who have been kept quiet by fear.

There is one thing I keep hearing in my heart, and that is:

 “Playing small is sometimes the biggest thing you can do.”

Playing small? Doesn’t that go against everything we believe in as entrepreneurs, coaches, writers, and overall badasses? We want to save and change the world, not shrink from it!

But when clarity arrives, it’s not small, it’s infinite. Paring down. Cutting away noise. Pruning thoughts of despair and shifting to possibility in the face of natural disasters is all we can do. We must take a trusting step toward the unknown.

We do what is right in front of us. The right thing that is right in front of us.

What’s in front of us now?

Lending a prayer. Holding a thought. Being mindful with resources. Inviting love back in. Planning that next business as a social enterprise. Loving that child. Holding that space.

Dancing. Forming. Rebuilding. Learning. Being of Beginner’s Mind as we redefine and recreate our world.

I’ve been moved by watching the rescuers, hearing the stories of hope, and experiencing generosity. Have you felt the love? People piling into cars to go help. Communities opening their arms to strangers. Choirs still singing of God’s grace. It’s been remarkable love. Not the kind of big love at first sight love, but the granular love. The love, in detail.

And so the quote that parked itself in my head: “Playing small is the biggest thing you can do” makes sense.

It’s the small acts that pile up. It’s the consistent ones that create a movement. It’s the diamond making its way into the sun.

We are all capable of starting the new business, writing the new book, creating the new product, and finding the right hire.

Should our actions take into consideration the state of our delicate world?

Yes, and as we are starting the next project or building the business we should ask ourselves:

How will this serve the planet?

How will this uplift people?

How will this inspire the souls of others?

Will this produce more hope, love, positivity, kindness?

Through that lens, we continue to build. We rekindle inspired acts of service. We help rebuild someone’s life through our small, daily endeavors.

So, as I move through the days where much is unstable: Refugees, wars, climate change, fires, earthquakes, hurricanes, I see that this time in our world is where civilization has a choice. Build things that matter, deeply matter, or let it go.

This is the time of diamond making. The pressure we are feeling in our world is the birth of a new us. Asking the small daily questions will provide the big next answer. Doing the small kind act will lead to the next big change.

Playing small, going granular, that takes big courage. What small, deliberate, kind next action can you take? What tiny goodness can you consistently offer others today? Share with me what small actions you are taking below, I can’t wait to hear how you are changing the world.

Here’s to Playing Small, in the Biggest Way,

There are times when our lives are touched by angels, and the lessons they teach us are meant to permeate every action we take as we traverse the journey of our lives. Meeting and working with Dr. Tererai Trent on her new book, The Awakened Woman, has taught me the power of positive thinking in ways I never thought possible. I wanted to share the three main lessons I’ve learned, and how you can adapt these practices in your own life to achieve what may seem like an impossible dream.

You see, Tererai is from a small cattle-herding village in Zimbabwe where very few girls are given a chance at an education. She taught herself to read and write, while working as a cattle herder and becoming a young mother. She knew there was more to life, and her determination and grit changed the course of her destiny, and for the thousands of girls and boys who now attend the schools she’s built with the help of Oprah.

I was once engaged to a romantic, handsome, wealthy, poetry-writing man. It was the early days of the tea company, and I had little in the way of resources. I’d get a poem and a plane ticket on a Friday afternoon in my inbox. He’d take me to Hawaii on a whim. He’d secretly pay my rent. He would arrive with flowers and a new dress. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world.

Considering I was in abject poverty not too long before this relationship, I felt like I’d won the jackpot of good fortune. He loved me, knew how to open my heart, and when he asked me to marry him, it was like my very own fairy tale. I loved his mom, I loved his sister, and I loved his lifestyle.

Soon, he bought a substantial property with several houses on it, and we began the exciting process of setting up our home. The property needed clearing, it needed a lot of work, and he went out and hired a big team of workers to go about the process of clearing fallen trees and rubble from the land.

One day, I came home from the tea company for lunch. I was going to surprise him—because even back then, I worked long hours and rarely saw him before sundown. As I snuck up the back side of the property, I heard him yelling at the workers. He was yelling because he was mad over something and he was saying it wasn’t his responsibility to buy them lunch.

In that moment, I saw a sad future. A man who yelled at day-laborers? A man who wouldn’t buy the men lunch during their 10-hour work day? As a fair trade activist, this made my blood boil. As a woman in hopeful love, it broke my heart. I immediately made plans, broke off the engagement, and moved out. Luckily, the guest house I’d moved from had just become available for rent again. I found that respecting workers wasn’t just a program for my tea company, it was a non-negotiable in all areas of my life. Economic disparity or paying someone never gives anyone permission to mistreat or belittle another sentient being.

This is what happens in life, writing, business, and relationships. We see something as one way and then it shifts suddenly—in a flash of insight—and we are moved to change course. We realize in these moments that we’ve been given a gift, which initially feels like a loss.

We have to clarify and stick to the non-negotiable elements of our character that define our future, and that give a top, bottom, and sides to who we really are. It’s not always sense-making. I remember going to therapy and the therapist said, “But, he’s a good man, why can’t you work it out?” I didn’t go back to her. I’d realized my non-negotiable in this situation: Whoever I would have in my life would be kind, generous, and have a fair trade mind and heart—even when I wasn’t looking.

People show you who they are sooner or later. People deserve the benefit of the doubt, always, but when you are observing them, you will be able to see who they are by how they treat people in everyday interactions. In the private moments they think no one is looking. You have to be able to respect the people who you interact with on a daily basis in your career, your writing circles, in your company, and in your home.

Who are you when no one is looking?
If you say you want to write and then piddle around avoiding it, it must be a negotiable.
If you say you want to start a business, but you keep doubting your ability, it must be a negotiable.

Take a look at the negotiables you’re displaying in your days and really decide who you want to be and how you might be negotiating that.

Writing for me? Non-negotiable.
People in integrity? Non-negotiable.
Anything to do with the well-being of my children and the planet? Non-negotiable.
Time to meditate: Non-negotiable
Love above all: Non-negotiable

What are your non-negotiables? Have you defined them yet? What are your non-negotiable commitments to yourself?

As I raise my children, build businesses, manage a household, help others achieve their dreams of being authors, and write my own passions onto paper, I am reminded of character. I am also reminded of those who are the exact same person on stage as off stage. Who have characters that are as kind and true in private as they are in profession. I am reminded of this romantic relationship where I suddenly saw the true character and realized the money, the comfort, the wealth and romance could never be enough to replace my non-negotiables.

What non-negotiable goals do you have for your life? And for your character?

Would you yell at your assistant and then go onstage claiming women’s empowerment?

Do you claim you want to write and then go on Facebook every time you sit down to focus?

Do you claim you want to change the world and then continue to buy into the current one?

Do you claim to be a healer and then treat your own body with carelessness?

What non-negotiables do you possess and profess publicly, and then what do you follow through on in private?

Because now is the time for integration. Today is the day your non-negotiables can become even more clarified and then fully-lived, connecting the dots to your holistic personal and worldview.

I’ll meet you in the comments, I can’t wait to hear what your non-negotiables are.

Here’s to your blooming, ever-evolving character!

With Love,

“Arrange whatever pieces come your way.” –Virginia Woolf

Virginia Woolf once said a woman has to have money and a room of her own to write fiction, I’d like to revise the notion now that we’ve got the internet and times have really changed. I say we do need space of our own, a laptop/computer, some earplugs, regularly scheduled time, and a lot of healthy, compassionate self-worth to give ourselves what we need to create.

I’m not talking bravado self-worth–the false kind we muster when defending our worth while navigating an inner dialogue of low self-worth. But I’m talking the quiet, kind, focused sort of worth an artisan gives her work. The kind of worth a master winemaker gives a vintage. The kind of worth a farmer sows into soil. The kind of worth that costs nothing and provides everything. Time. Caring. Commitment. Quiet confidence.

As I’ve been working with a contractor to build my new writing “shed” (since I had to take down my yurt), it’s been interesting to look at what I think this space is “worth.” I’ve been looking at windows, building materials, you name it, and budgeting what my writing space “should” cost. I’ve been struck with a question, “What’s it worth to me?” Which could easily be shifted to: “What is my writing worth to me” ahem, everything. And then, “Is my writing worth all of this cost?”  And then when I drill down: Am I worth this?
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Am I using the building of a new writing shed to procrastinate my writing? Am I addicted to the build up of writing and decorating? If the writing is so important to me, why don’t I just don my headphones and grab my laptop and write? Why go through all of the expense of a new structure? Is the money worth more in the bank then in a structure I can go escape to and write?

It’s been interesting how much I put off the spending when it comes to MY space, and how I’ll jump into redesign the living room and fund it without a question as it’s for the family and friends. With this exercise, I’ve realized I have been masking my lack of self-worth by working too much and avoiding what I really want.

A damn room of my own.

Really, my own.

No kittens, kids or piles of laundry.

A room with a lock and key only I have.

As we discover what we truly are called by our souls to do, we need to ask ourselves some questions.
Are you willing to be worth the time to daydream?

Are you worth the time it’ll take to rewrite?

Are you worth the space it’ll take to spread out creatively, emotionally, physically?

Are you worth the energy it’ll require to follow, pursue, and truly uncover your original dream?

Are you worth the money it’ll cost to nurture your needs: For me I need total silence.

Claiming a space of your own takes energy. Finding where you fit in the world takes time. Understanding you may not fit a genre, system or industry takes courage, and in my world, a community. But, nothing can happen until you decide you are worth it.

Will your work be worth reading?
I don’t know, did you give it the time to be worth reading?

Will the effort you’ll put into your business be worth it?
I don’t know, will the business be worth your time to build it?

I get questions from authors and CEO’s who are wanting to embody their own brand like, “Will blogging be worth it in building a platform?”

I say, “Will it be worth reading?” If not, then it’s not worth it to yourself or others.

And that’s the question, isn’t it? Are you worth success? Are you worth giving the space and time to reflect, rewrite, ponder, and read? Do you value your contributions or are you hoping to validate them by someone else’s opinion?

When you are ready to answer “Yes, I am worth it,” as a full-body yes, then you will be able to achieve and receive it.

Are you worth a room of your own? Are you worth the time you want to spend writing or creating? Are your ideas worthy enough to get funded? Are you worthy enough to get funded?

Guess who the only person is that can answer those questions?
YOU.
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So, Virginia Woolf is right in the sense you need resources—space and money to cover your bills so you can write. You need though to have enough self-worth to honor yourself that space to think, to write, to dream, to envision.

You need to decide that your dreams are worth the time, money, effort, and love it’s going to take to invest in them. Until you do that wholeheartedly, it’ll be hard to write, create and build something that others will stop and notice. You are your first reader, your first customer, your first supporter—how well are you doing on those fronts?

You need to decide that your intuition and sensitivity are precious resources and worth exploring.
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You need to choose to give yourself the time to potentially fail, potentially rise, potentially find that you have not only something to say, but you have something to express that may not make sense in the first or second draft. But you are worth the third draft. And the fourth.

You need to decide that your expression on this earth is worth your time, effort, and space.

Because no one else can give you worth. It’s got to emanate from you.

No publisher can give you worth. No agent can. No reader can. No viewer or customer can. Unless you are ready to be worth it to yourself. That worth is what brings all other things to you.

Be worth a room, a forest, a quiet space to focus. Be worth support. Be worth time to be.
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Be worth abundance. Be worth a reader’s time. Be worth that big dream coming true.
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Because if you don’t think yourself worthy how will we?

Let’s claim your worth this week. Let me know how you do and what exercises or gifts you give yourself in the realm of space, time, money and permission.

I’ll meet you in the comments. Here’s to your worth. I’m stating for all to read here that I’m getting the soundproofing for my writing shed—even if it’s expensive 🙂

​​​​​​​With Love, 

Learning to be at home with yourself in the uncertain moments is the highest achievement you can accomplish in this lifetime. Endings are a thing, even a place, where you are guaranteed a workout in uncertainty. Some of us avoid endings, and some of us welcome them. The thrill seekers choose endings regularly, while most of us don’t particularly seek them out.

If you’ve worked with me you will hear me say, “How you end or finish things is more important than how you begin them.” It’s true in the sense that your true character shows up in the endings—and also how much you need to grow becomes apparent in the endings.

This weekend was the final Empowered Author’s Academy and everyone asked why I would end something that was so beautiful, transformative, and impactful and I honestly have to say, I didn’t know. I just knew it was the end. Does that scare me? Yep, a little. Do I welcome being with myself in that fear? Yes, I like to examine my fear of the unknown often. Do I want to see what else I’m capable of creating—yes, that is the biggest aspect of endings I cherish—the means to finding growth. Endings offer us growth, so why do we avoid them?

I’m ending a lot of things these days. Ending my frustration with things I can’t change. Ending my contracts with clients to make room for what’s yet unknown. Ending my desire to control my teenaged son. Ending some bad habits like texting during weekends and dinner time (I know, jeez, you’d think I’d know better. Mia has pointed out that it’s hurting her time with me), and generally creating clearer boundaries on all fronts.

Why now? Because it’s being demanded of me. And you may feel the same way. You may feel the need to say no more often, to shut out the noise, to say how you really feel—even if it means the end of things as you know them. I’m even ending my subscriptions to HULU, HBO GO, and a lot of other things in the midst of ending bigger things. I am ending my email subscriptions to many people who just don’t inspire me but I felt “bad” for clicking unsubscribe. I am just letting that sh*t go. (And can someone please tell Brendan Burchard that when someone unsubscribes he needs to stop emailing?)

I’m ending the idea I have to save people from their ignorance. That’s a big one. Because who am I to think I have that much power anyway? Ha. I bet the angels laugh at all the things we think we are capable of controlling 🙂

And a couple days ago, as the universe is prone to do, I received the answer as to why ending Empowered Author’s Academy and some of these other projects was important or even needed.

My friend Nick, who is the creative director of “The Secret”, stopped me outside my office door to say hi. He’d been traveling all summer and it was our first hug in months. He said, “I know why you’re ending Author’s Academy.”

Bemused, I asked, “Why?”

“Because then you can have a comeback,” his eyes sparkled.
You can’t have a comeback, an encore, without an ending.”

Wow. Yep. That one got me. As if my guardian angel whispered it in his ear.

It’s time for an encore. A respite, so we can come back stronger, better. But things have to end first.

What do you want or what are you willing to end in order to return later as a better, brighter, bigger, shinier version of you?

What ending are you putting off?
Or better yet:
What gorgeous comeback are you putting off?

What if you just knew the payoff would be better, brighter, and more sparkly than the ending?

What is filling your mind, heart and psyche up so there can’t be room for your delicious rebirth?

Here’s to making beautiful endings, so you can have a “comeback” an encore, a new version of you emerging for the world to see and celebrate with you?

I look forward to hearing what you are ending, finishing, completing…in the comments!

Here’s to your rebirth,